Date: Saturday, March 8th
Place: Montreal International Airport
Headache: Hey, Jamie!
Me: OMG. Are you kidding me?
Headache: I don’t seem to understand what you mean.
Me: I mean, are you serious?… Right now?
Headache: Meaning what?
Me: Meaning that you’re uh… about to kill me?
Headache: Oh! You mean that? Oh yeah, I am totally serious…
Me: That’s not funny.
Headache: Girl, I’m a beta version of a new headache. By staying at the airport all day today, dealing with a snowstorm and having lack of sleep, you’ve just signed up for a free trial of my new and improved services… the same thing apply for a few of your co-workers.
Me: Well, I am not interested on a free trial. Thanks.
Headache: Too late.
Me: Oh, come on! I didn’t ask for this.
Headache: Hmm, I am assuming you’re having a severe pain right about………. Now!
Me: Gee, thanks…
Headache: Let’s see. It kinda feels like your head is a balloon that’s about to explode and on top of that you’re feeling tired and sleepy, but can’t sleep.
Me: You’re right.
Headache: Yep, is our new version of the classic headache with some add-ons. Is it effective?
Me: Well, now that my flight to Miami got cancelled after a 4 hour wait, and the entire airport shutting down, leading us to a one-mile-long cab line for the last hour or so. Now all of a sudden, while in line, a wave of pain comes to my head so intense that I cannot think straight. I guess you could consider it to be somewhat effective, don’t you think?
Me: You know what? I don’t want to talk to you.
Headache: Well, if you’re nice to me, I might be able to relax my grip a bit.
Me: I don’t know. I… I’ll think about it. Ugh. Is there a place to sit around here? My feet hurt so much…
Headache: Amazing, isn’t it?
Me: Yeah, you idiot, it’s incredible. Go ahead and give yourself a hug! Has anyone ever told you that you are annoying?
Headache: Please don’t talk to me like that. That is unprofessional.
Me: Ok, fine…. I cannot believe I have to go through all of this airport thing again tomorrow. I hope I wake up rested.
Headache: If I help you sleep at night…
Me: You know what? You’re a jackass.