There are a couple of commercials on the tele that I find really creepy:
Brawny Paper Towel
Have you seen the Brawny paper towel commercials? You know… that Brawny man: the pretty dude staring into the camera, flirting to numerous housewives in America while cleaning up a mess, with the soft porn music in the background. And then pick up a puppy with some icing on its nose and continues staring flirtatiously like he’s the last coca cola in the world.
His image has decorated Brawny packages and conquered women’s fantasies since 1972. Wearing his plaid lumberjack shirt, Brawny Man leads the guys by teaching basic skills like toilet and kitchen cleaning and spill picking. Naturally, when the guys make a mess, there’s a roll of Brawny paper towels nearby to do the clean-up.
He can cook a great meal, he’s even baked a birthday cake, and he’s in the kitchen… waiting for you with puppy in hand. How desirable! Now, there’s a lot of women out there who think this is the image of every woman’s perfect man…Are you freaking kidding me? Are you high?
Well, at least he has progressed since then. If you look at the pictures, you’ll see he has turned from a 70’s porn star into a clean-cut North Dakotan. All he’s missing is a machete or a fishing pole.
Somehow it’s really wrong for that puppy to be involved. I can’t reach for the remote fast enough!
Update about this article (05/08/07):
I do not mean that a man shouldn’t help with the cleaning around the house, what I am saying is… at least look straight while you’re doing it.
Yep. Ever since I started seeing these guys on the tele, I’ve got the cleanest toes on the planet! I just looove watching some insects lift toenails to about a 45 degree angle, and then crawl under and start digging holes. You slimy little toe gremlins!
And here’s the best part. Lamisil is just what I need to fight these filthy parasites! That is, if I don’t mind a stroke, diarrhea, vertigo, hives, upset stomach, nausea, abdominal pain, appendicitis, rash, itching, and liver diseases. But it will definitely clean my toes, right?